The Taylored Word
My situation is that I am very lonely, and I would probably settle for anyone at this point my life. I have been very successful in my career, but not in my private life, and I have no idea how to approach a woman or how to have a mature relationship. I certainly do not want a woman who is only with me for my money. At the end of the day, I would know the truth in my heart. I ultimately want a healthy, happy and long marriage. Please show me the way.
Bewildered in Belleair
Dear Bewildered in Belleair,
First let me say that self-confidence is probably the most attractive feature on a man or a woman for that matter. Secondly, people smell desperation so it's not about pretending that you are not desperate, it is actually "feeling" you are not desperate. People pick up positive energy, and will know in a heartbeat if you are acting. What I would suggest to begin with is a test. Be the "hunter," but not overly aggressive…be kind, but never allow anyone to mistake kindness for weakness…most importantly, have fun in your quest. There are many avenues in which to begin your search…and I would be happy to provide a few. Please email me with your wish list and then we'll put together some ideas…then put one foot in front of the other on the quest to find the love of your life, and please be open to the possibilities without any expectations…just "feel" the positive outcome.
My wife confuses me all the time. We have been married for many years but I never know how to react or answer to her liking. I do love her, but I feel that no matter what I say I cannot make her happy. Do you have any advice on how I can better understand my wife and make her happy?
Confused in Clearwater
Dear Confused in Clearwater
I believe God has the answer to this question over which men have been deliberating for centuries… A man sitting on a California beach was deep in prayer, and then the booming voice of God said, "You have been very faithful to me in all ways, and I want to grant you one wish." The man said, "Well I have been thinking how much I love Hawaii but it takes so much money and time to get there by plane and I was wondering…how about building a bridge to Hawaii so I can just drive over anytime I want." God said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take over thousands of miles! The many men who may lose their lives. This is a very selfish request and you have always been so unselfish…please take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honor me." The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "God, you certainly know how many times I have been married and all about my relationships…I truly wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking, why they cry, what they mean when they say 'nothing!', and how I can make a woman truly happy." There was silence and then God said, "Do you want that to be a two lane or four lane?" All kidding aside, why not try a different tactic. For instance if she asks you how she looks in a certain dress, just a simple, loving answer…for example…"darling, to me, you are the most beautiful woman in the world. As a man who loves you for you, it really doesn't matter what you are wearing, but with that said, you look absolutely beautiful tonight." Just think of the rewards (wink).
A small bit of advice to both sexes…
Good morning Taylor,
My dilemma is that I have been dating this guy for about 6 months and I really like him but he hardly ever calls me and I am always asking him out and I am always paying when we go out to eat, even for fast food. What do you think I should do to get him to pay more attention to me?
Distressed in Dunedin
Dear Distressed in Dunedin,
My dear…simply he is just not that into you. When a guy/man ignores you, does not call, does not respect your time and allows you to pay for everything, I believe it is time to move on. Start this little routine…when you wake up in the morning go to your mirror and look at yourself and say…"I am beautiful, inside and out. I am a good person. I feel good and I am positive this day will be perfect for me." Positive reinforcement always works wonders, and doing it for ourselves as well as others, enforces it two-fold. Trust me, it brings positive energy back to you, like a boomerang. What you give out, you get back.
If negative thoughts invade your life do what I call Flip Switch…immediately recognize that that you are having a negative thought and think of something, anything that always makes you smile. Maybe it's something funny that your child or pet did, or a sibling or friend. Or possibly a day on the beach. Anything that makes you smile. Think positive thoughts and positive results will come your way.
Sometimes I use the expression "fate took a turn for the better". Do you believe one's "fate" following an unfortunate event can be changed through loving thoughts and/or prayer? Please share with me ways you've seen where people have been able to change fate for the better in their lives.
Fatalist in Feather Sound
Dear Fatalist in Feather Sound,
That is great question and one many have questioned over the centuries and it fits right in with the positive energy, flip switching attitude I have commented on. I have known in many cases, where change has occurred when positive vibrations were sent out to the universe and prayer accompanied it If you peruse the medical community you will find many documented cases where doctors have admitted that even with all their knowledge and experience they had no explanation as to why some patients with terminal diseases lived and some did not, except for the fact that a majority of the people who survived were surrounded by loving family and friends, prayed and had enormous positive energy surrounding them. As I have said, life is a boomerang and what you send out, you get back…in some cases ten-fold…and that's good thing.
The Taylored Word this week is giving…in the sense of "giving back."
Warren Buffett and Bill Gates have voiced their opinion on this issue…they are in total agreement that there is not greater feeling, other than the birth of their children or their marriages. In fact, Mr. Buffett's comment in regard to the fact that most of the fortune he had accumulated over his lifetime was to be donated to the Melinda and Bill Gates Foundation.
"I want to give my kids just enough so that they would feel that they could do anything, but not so much that they would feel like doing nothing."
Do your heart and soul good…find a charity or non-profit organization that you feel would fit your life and lifestyle. Get your children engaged, for they learn by example. The difference it will make in all your live is priceless.
Please keep your letters and questions coming…and email any questions you may have to TheTayloredWord@yahoo.com.
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